Thursday, September 27, 2012

Be patient.

I always feel bad when I complain that I am stressed or I have so much to do. I always feel like a whiner that can't handle a simple curve ball.
Even though I may complain when things get too busy or chaotic, I never forget what a great life that I have. When I take a look at my life, the first thing that I think is "I am SO blessed!!" I am blessed because I have a fantastic family, fantastic friends, Mike has a great job that pays well and allows me to be a stay-at-home mom comfortably, we are all in good health (and, I hope I didn't just jinx anything!), and the list goes on and on!
So, the reason I don't like to complain is because I feel like, "Really...what do I have to complain about??" But, you know what...regardless of my situation in life or how blessed that I am, I still struggle with things. I still need help. I still get stressed. I still have things that bother me. I still have selfish moments where I just want more and more. And, that is just fine. I am human.
I tend to compare myself to other people a lot. And, I am sure most of you do the same. ;) What I have come to realize that by doing that is, I lose focus on myself, my family and what works for us. Just because so and so can manage 10 kids with a husband that is never home and still looks perfectly put together and never raises her voice at her kids...doesn't mean that I should be able to do the same. I manage things the way that I manage things...there is no right or wrong...it's just my way. Plain and simple.
We all have strengths and weaknesses.
My weakness is that I have no patience. I want things done a certain way. I want things done immediately when I ask. I want my kids to act respectful at all times. I don't want to have hiccups during my weight loss. And, I want to be able to accomplish too many tasks in not enough time.
Now...my strength is...that I have common sense. I realize that everything that I just said is completely absurd and unachievable. My strength is knowing that I don't have to have the patience of Job. I just need to be able to accept mistakes. Live and learn.
Although, this month was trying on my patience and very stressful. It was necessary for me to figure things out about myself. So, I am grateful for it. I have learned that I can fail, but then still pick myself up and keep on trying. I used to say "Screw it!" and give up. But, not this time! I gained 3 weeks in a row. It made me SO mad! But, the only one to blame was myself because I was the one that didn't follow plan. I understand that. I accept that. I forgave myself. I then turned it around and had a great weigh in this week. I lost 4.2 lbs!! I still have a couple more to lose to get back to where I was, but that won't take long.
I think the biggest lesson that I learned was, that...it isn't that I need to learn patience for others, it is that I need to learn patience with myself.
This journey is taking longer than I had anticipated, but as long as I am getting good results I am ok with that. This journey is more than just numbers on a scale or tape measure, it's about growing up and it's about self discovery. Although...I still want to see those numbers drop!! And quickly too!! So much for patience, huh... ;)

1 comment:

Michele A said...

Patience is one of those things you NEVER ask God for!!!! He'll force patience upon you. :)

Keep up the great job, you're sooo worth it!!