Wednesday, January 17, 2018

Goodbye 2017...good riddance.

It's a new year, and you know what that means...new start.
Why is it we always wait until the new year to make changes?? It's kinda like waiting until Monday to start your diet. Whatever the reason, I don't care. I'm going to do the same thing this new year as I did last year. Forget about anything that I did or that happened to get me off my plan to good health. It's a new year! Woohoo!!
But first, shall we officially say goodbye to 2017. 
AKA...the WORST year of my life. Serious. No joke.
It started off bad and just kept getting worse. The ONLY saving grace or high point of the year was our family trip to Florida and adopting two adorable little kittens. The rest of the year for me personally just plain sucked.
I can't say that it was out of my control though...most of it anyway. All of my poor decisions and habits over the last 20 years has lead up to this awful year. I have made it no secret that I eat like crap and hate to exercise. I have tried numerous times over the years to change and get on the right track. Each time, certain that this is the last time and I will prevail. And, I do well for awhile, but then fall off the wagon for one reason or another and revert back to old and familiar habits. Which eventually leads me right back to where I started or worse. I've done this charade more times than I can count, to the point that my family has taken what I say with a grain of salt, when it comes to my 'ready to lose weight' speech. As they should. I certainly haven't proven that I can follow through to the end. I'll lose 20 pounds or 50 pounds, even 85 pounds at one point and then just quit. Why?? Heck, I don't know. I just do. I'm sure there's some deep hidden explanation that I'd have to pay some shrink thousands of dollars to uncover, but I don't have the money or desire to do that. So...I will just make another attempt and have faith that I won't quit this time. I have faith in me. My family has faith in me. They know what I'm capable of and they cheer me on no matter how many times I've let them down. I am so grateful for my constant and unwavering support system.
So, let's recap 2017 shall we. First, I have to say that, I have had a lot of questions answered amidst all of this. And because of that, I have new knowledge about my body, which will help me in my future endeavors. For that, I am thankful.
It started out with the diagnosis of the Lipodema and Lymphedema disorders/diseases involving my lower body. I spent 3 months doing anything the doctors suggested to help remedy all the weight and fluid build up that these diseases have caused. I was not successful. The only thing that has helped this condition is the elimination of a medication that caused water retention. However, by eliminating this medicine, it brought on another problem involving my Diabetes. I will go into that later.
After trying all the methods to reduce the effects of the Lipolymphedema and seeing no results, I signed up to get help surgically. This surgery is a liposuction done to suck out the diseased fat, getting my body back to a more manageable state.
But...my body had other plans.
2017 punch in the face #2...blood clots in my lungs. Pulmonary Embolism (PE). Three to be exact. Second time getting them. Not something to mess around with, so I decide to focus on taking care of that before moving forward with the surgery. I am now on blood thinners for the rest of my life. Lovely. But, I'd rather have that than another clot that could potentially be fatal. I could still get the surgeries for the Lipolymphedema, but after finding out what the total cost would be, I decided to wait for awhile. I want to see what I can do on my own through lifestyle changes before spending that kind of money on a fix that may not work and would be temporary.
Moving on to 2017 punch in the face #3...blood sugar numbers reaching 400. They are supposed to be under 140. This is what happened after I stopped taking that medication I was talking about. I have been functioning with super high blood sugars for months without knowing it. And the reason that I didn't know was...'Ummm, I am a loser Diabetic that doesn't check her sugars?' Bingo! If I ignore it, it will go away. Right?? Ignorance is bliss?? No? Ok fine, all joking aside. One night I felt really crappy and thought 'what the heck, I'll check my sugar', Novel idea. I was shocked to see a '400' on my tester. Crap! That's not good. So, I saw my doctor and he has me now taking Insulin. Which didn't really help much. So, guess what...more Insulin. I'm thinking maybe I should just bathe in it. Would that be weird?? Anyway, I am now sticking myself with needles more times than I care to and I have to say that it's working. My sugars are getting much better and I'm feeling a lot better. Whew.
Bring on 2018!! Thank goodness. Let's put all of this behind me and work on recovery and getting the weight off.
HAHAHAHA!!! NOT.
My body isn't finished yet. On comes the first punch in the face for the new year...Chest pains! That's right! Let's start the new year with a bang!
The pain started on the right side, a shooting pain when I ate. It stopped for awhile, then moved around to my upper back. What is causing this? Hmmm. Let's check out my symptoms and try to figure this out on my own. Because, I mean, we all have unsigned PhD's right? I know I do. I diagnose myself all the time. So, my professional diagnosis after thorough research was Gallbladder stones. I just knew that I had a golf ball sized stone trying to push it's way through a teeny tiny opening and then getting stuck causing me to collapse and be rushed to the hospital. Well, I can't let that happen. So I call the nurse and she didn't seem as overexcited as I was. Such a dud. She had me wait it out and stop eating fried foods. What?! Stop eating fried foods?? That's worse than a golf ball sized gallstone! Ok fine. So, I kinda listened and stopped eating some fried foods. But 2 days later the pain is worse and now focused in the front. My boobs! They were killing me! I tried to get Mike to hold them and make them feel better. But he wouldn't. Stupid kids still living at home. 😒😉 Takes away all the fun.
So, this time the nurse has me come in to see the doctor. They do an EKG on me to check my heart. My heart looks good. Yay! He asks me all kinds of questions about my eating habits, when the pain is the worst and so forth. He has ruled out gallstones. So much for my self taught PhD. He then pushes around on my tummy and gets down to the lower right and pushes in. I about hit the roof. Uh-oh. Appendix. Which I thought was really weird because I have had no pain in that area until he pushed on it. He didn't like the way I reacted to that exam so he ordered a CT Scan. I am actually very excited about this because it will show a picture of my whole abdomen. I have had tummy issues and bowel issues for a long time including a cough that has kept me up at night quite frequently. So, this scan will answer a lot of questions, not just the appendix one. I get to the hospital for my scan and have to drink a ton of water containing contrast, wait an hour and then get a technician that I'm guessing went to the 'how to miss a vein while inserting an IV school' and passed with flying colors. After 30 minutes and numerous arm bruises later, I'm done. Now we wait. Finally, I get a call with the results. Hiatal hernia and Umbilical hernia. After all that. I'm glad that I don't have anything that requires surgery right away. But, guess what I do have. A stupid hernia that requires me to eat better!!! 😡
Have we just come full circle? Eating better. That's the answer to all my problems. When will I learn this. Actually I learned this a long time ago, I was just refusing to do it.
2017 is over. 2018 started off rocky. but has given me peace. I have the answers to all my body questions. I am armed with the knowledge and understanding of what my body is saying and what hurdles I will face. This will help lessen the pressure I put on myself to always have amazing results. I am starting Weight Watchers again and will begin a pool exercise regimen that will be kinder to my body but still work it out. I am setting achievable goals. I am focused on changing my lifestyle permanently. I have slacked off long enough, my body is yelling at me to stop. If I keep tuning it out, sooner or later it will give up. And I don't want that. There's too much I have to look forward to.
Here's to a better 2018 with improved health and lots of weight loss!! 


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