School's out...

School's out...now what???
For the past 9 months, I have been very spoiled. With my youngest being in school full time, I have had all day...8am-2pm...all to myself. I have had complete control over my schedule...for the most part... and I could totally focus on ME. So, that's what I did.
The first half of the school year, didn't really go how I planned. My vision was to start dieting and losing weight as soon as school started. Well, that didn't happen. But, that's ok. I was working on my mental state and less on my physical state. At least...that's what I've been telling myself. :) Then I came back to reality. And, the truth is...it was more like, "NO KIDS! Live it up!!" I was enjoying the much needed ME time. Don't get me wrong...I LOVE my kids. And, you know what, I can still love them, while they're at school! LOL :) But, honestly, I think I did a lot of soul searching during that time. I realized a lot of things about myself and my habits and my behaviors. And, I decided, it was time for a Jill Overhaul.
So, the second half of the school year has gone just how I envisioned. I have become dedicated and motivated to change. I have forced myself to exercise 4-5 days a week...and not just walking leisurely for 30 minutes a day. I have been really working on getting more fit and stronger. So far, I have lost 35" as a result. I have a routine that I try to stick to as best as I can. And, some days I have to switch things around, but I almost always get it done. I was patient with myself at first because let's face it...I was 375 lbs when I started...so my abilities were limited. But, I recognized when things were getting easier so I pushed myself. And, how exciting it is to be able to bend easier, lift more weight, do more reps and just notice the fat disappearing.
I also, have been tracking what I eat everyday. That is a real eye opener! At first, it's overwhelming to remember every "bite, lick and taste" a.k.a. BLT that I put in my mouth. But, if I want to lose weight...then I need to SUCK it up and do it! What has been interesting to notice about myself, is the desire to really stick with it and not cheat. I used to try to fill my points with junk food. I was still within my points...so who will know, right? The scale knew, I knew...and my weight loss was very slow, if at all. Now, I really try to eat healthy and make smart choices...and I have lost 46.2 lbs as a result. My next venture...to drastically cut down on processed food and eat more natural foods. This will be a challenge because I have to create a lot of new habits. But, I am always up for a challenge!
So, getting back to school being out. There goes my ME time for 3 months. I can't lie...I'm nervous! As a mother, I am afraid that I will fall into the ever so familiar pattern of "putting the kids first". Do I want to make them go to the gym with me? Do I want to make them wake up early to go to park and walk before it gets blazing hot? Do I want to exercise in front of them and be embarrased as my fat is jiggling everywhere? No...not really. But, will I? Yes. This is going to be tough though. I will for sure hear moans and groans coming from the peanut gallery, but you know what..."Tough cookies!" . I can not get off of this GREAT rhythm that I have. So, I will make it work!
The hardest part will be coordinating exercise time, activity time and "school time" to prepare them for next year. Sydney needs a lot of one on one time to get her ready! Let's not forget...just time to chill out and enjoy the summer! Food has me concerned too. If we're out and about a lot, I really have to force myself to plan ahead, so I am not picking up fast food all the time. 
I just have to keep telling myself to...relax...focus...and don't get flustered. Keep my goals in mind. If I keep myself organized and prepared then everything should run smoothly. Right? Here's hoping! :)