Frustrated

I know I shouldn't be frustrated, but I am. I know that I tend to bite off more than I can chew and I expect too much of myself at times. And, I know that I run myself ragged with all the demands that I put on myself.  Which then results in me failing at something and then I get FRUSTRATED and wonder why.
I sometimes live in a fantasy world and I think I will lose lots of weight every week...knowing full well that having that thought is ridiculous. But...I can't help it, I still think that way. I guess that is why I refer to myself as the "Unrealistic Optimist".
Sometimes, I have a week where I feel like I have eaten really well and I have been super diligent with my exercise. Then I weigh in, and if I don't see the results that I want, I get really mad. But, why do I get mad if I am still losing?? I don't get it!! I mean really, I did lose almost a pound this week, I should be satisfied with that, right? Maybe it's because I am so close to 60 pounds. Maybe it's because I am so close to being under 300 lbs. I don't know. I think it's just that...each week that I have a small number, it adds on another week until I get to those goals. And, that irritates me!
I'll tell you one thing though, I am tired. I keep myself so busy to the point that I don't allow myself quality chill out time. But the problem is, when I do have chill out time, I am constantly thinking about of all the things that I should be doing! So how do I win?!? I don't like to exercise in front of the kids. I want to put on my headphones and be LEFT ALONE and that won't happen while the kids are awake. So, I end up exercising a few nights a week until midnight. I actually really enjoy exercising, but this schedule is wearing me out. And, I haven't figured out the balance of pushing my body and letting my body rest. I know there has to be a special formula somewhere. But, honestly, in my brain, I think that the more I exercise the more results I will get. Sounds logical right? I don't know...I'm just confused...and frustrated. Grrrr!
Don't even get me started on food! What a headache! Planning...shopping...prepping...counting!  I think I need a personal chef and a grocery shopper! That would be AWESOME! But, eventhough it's a headache, I think I am actually doing pretty well with food. But, am I saying that because I'm in denial?? Am I convincing myself that I am doing things right because I am too afraid to admit otherwise? I really don't think so. I know that I am not perfect by any stretch of the means. And, I know that I am making smart choices. Question is...am I doing enough?? Am I starting to get lazy?? Only thing I can do now is get super strict with measuring. I think that might be where I am hurting myself. I don't know...we'll find out next week I guess.
You know, I think I do a good job at really trying to stay postive all the time..but sometimes,  I just get frustrated!!  And, I really don't like feeling this way, but I am human, and I have to allow myself to be honest and release ALL my emotions if I want to get back on track! Fortunately for me, I bounce back very quickly. So, by the time I post this, I'll probably be back to normal. LOL! :) This too shall pass, right? RIGHT!