Understanding myself and keeping my "bucket" full

One of the most difficult things for a woman to do is to take care of themselves without feeling guilty. As a woman we are designed to be nurturers. We take care of all of those around us, putting ourselves on the back burner. Whether we are taking care of our kids, our husband, our parents, our friends or having other responsibilities like fulfilling a church calling, going to work, volunteering...all of these things take time away from us taking care of ourselves.
It's so easy to put all of those things first. But...in order for us to be good nurturers...we need to be as strong emotionally and physically as possible. And, if we ignore our own needs...no matter what they are...it will affect how we behave.
This is something that I have been thinking about for a long time. I LOVE to serve others. I love to help out wherever I can, regardless of what's going on in my own life. I will never change that. But now, I just need to remember to add myself into the mix. I need to serve myself just as much.
I have made a few changes recently that have been beneficial. One change that is very unlike me,  but has made a noticeable impact is...I am now reading a lot more. I've always hated reading...I felt it was unproductive and boring. But, I have recently found a series of books by an author that I have really enjoyed and I have been looking forward to picking up that book each day. In the past, I would try to buy these "self help" books in hopes of finding the cure to my problems. Those are just overwhelming and depressing at times. But...getting into a good story that will completely immerse me into another world...that's therapeutic. Sometimes it's hard to separate what I've been reading and real life because I get so engrossed in it.
One thing I've found out with buying diet books, nutrition books, self help books or whatever else I have 'self diagnosed myself with and now need to do an enormous amount of research on' is...too much information is most of the time more confusing than helpful. Let's take dieting for example...there are SO many theories out there about how we should eat and what we should eat. Who is right?? This person says carbs are fine, but this person says carbs are bad. OR This person says coffee, wine and dark chocolate are beneficial to our health, but this person says they have no benefits. Even Weight Watchers can't seem to stick to a plan. One of the most irritating changes to Weight Watchers was when they started allowing us to count diet soda as a one of our daily water check offs. That is ridiculous! Plus the fact they have changed their program a dozen times since I started for the first time over 20 years ago. Very confusing. What it all comes down to is...I'm tired of listening to everyone's theories and changing over and over, confusing my body and overwhelming my mind.
I am going to live my life without feeling like a nun's ruler is waving over my hand waiting for me to screw up. I will screw up. And that's ok. Just keep on trying.
I am Diabetic, so one thing I know FOR SURE is...my body does not need sugar.
I need a balanced diet which includes drastically limiting my consumption of white sugar. I need LOTS of water to help flush out all this excess water weight that I lug around everyday (sounds kind of weird to drink water in order to get rid of water). Eat less processed foods that contain a ton of sodium...that'll help the water retention too. Exercise to keep things moving and to lift my mood. When I feel good, I behave better.
Speaking of behaving better...let's go back to us needing to take care of ourselves.
I heard a metaphor today that I really enjoyed because it helped draw a clearer picture of what kind of lifestyle a lot of us women have. Here is the metaphor...
Picture a beautiful oak bucket made of nice thick beautiful wood. The bottom of the bucket is solid and sturdy. There is a shiny gold band around the bucket securing the wood. The beautiful bucket represents us (the woman). Now picture that bucket full of water. The water represents our service to others. Now picture a big ladle...representing all the outside sources that need our service. Each time our kids need something, they (the ladle) will take out a scoop of water (our service). Same goes for whoever or whatever comes along needing our service...each time we serve, another scoop of water comes out. If we continue to serve everyone nonstop...the bucket will eventually empty. And, once all of the water is gone, that ladle will start chipping away at the solid and sturdy bottom. So, sooner or later there will be no more bottom and the bucket will be useless. So...how do we replenish the water so the bucket won't empty out? Simple. We take care of ourselves. Each act of service we do for ourselves will add more water to that bucket. So...read that book...take that nice relaxing bubble bath...go get a pedicure...go out and get rid of some aggression at the batting cage...whatever it is that helps you. We can't let that bucket become useless. Because then we are NO good to anyone...depression, illness, breakdowns they all become realities.
So anyway...bottom line...I am going to allow myself to indulge in acts of TLC for me. Guilt free. If my mind is healthy then I will be able to make better decisions and choices.
Now...with having a clearer vision of what it takes to change my lifestyle and with the understanding of knowing that I am not perfect...I am ready for Round 2. This time I am involving my family. We all need to change. And boy do I have a lot of changes in store for us. I won't overwhelm us with too many at once, but we will be stretched out of our comfort zone.
Here's to good health and long and happy lives.